Thursday, April 17, 2014

Those 4 little words

There have been few things in my life that have stopped me dead in my tracks or changed my direction so abruptly. There is always "the look". Whether from my Mom or Dad as a child or from my husband now, it is always a visual incentive to change something NOW.  Rarely did the look from mom or dad ever evolve into more. I'm just good like that. (I hear you giggling).  The look from my husband on the other hand, never ends well. Either because I've already stepped over the line or I just keep on going.

The last time the look didn't work, I told him it was ok to tell me to stop before I got that far. Before I pushed the envelope to the point of no return. It was ok to let me know he'd had enough already.   I can be a talker. When things aren't going my way, I tend to want to over compensate with explanation. I am of course right, he just needs to hear all my reasons. Or when I'm being playful and he's not feeling it the same way, I guess I can come off as annoying.   (I don't get it, but I guess it's possible).

So the other day, in the midst of a playful banter. I heard it. ENOUGH. Just 1 word. It was all I needed. Butterflies and chills, I stopped. Walked away and left it alone. It was over before I got myself into trouble. That one word. That one second to stop, regroup and walk away. I never thought it would work but it did. I've heard that one a few more times and each time the same result.  This even works in text form. From the other side of town, the one word text just ends it always the same. Butterflies and chills but no trouble.

Then there's the other three words. Also the power to stop me dead in my tracks but always too late. A line is already crossed, a rule already broken. We will talk. Talk talk? No, more he lectures, I listen kind of talk. This talk always ends up with me in a very vulnerable position begging for another chance. (I don't really beg - out loud anyway).  These words are usually on the phone or in a text. Rarely in person.  The power they carry is immeasurable. I know instantly what the future holds and it's going to be painful. Unfortunately, I've seen too many of this text lately.

We will talk is different than let's talk. Let's talk is more right now, in your face kind of trouble. The we will talk is more of a just wait til you get home kind of trouble. The kind you think about maybe for hours, dreading the idea of actually talking.

Words do have power.

I'm still learning. He's still learning. We are enjoying the journey - together!


  1. Erika,
    I am learning that word "ENOUGH" mean u better STOP now! I am getting it, it might have taken me awhile but as u r, we are still learning! I love your blog!

    1. Thanks Honey
      Now if the was an ENOUGH before I broke a rule, I'd be all set.